Dating a married man? what you can expect!

Oh Sienna, you're playing with fire.

- and you're going to get your fingers burnt! Either your lover, oil heir Balthazar Getty, will be lured back to his family life being the father of four children that he undoubtedly feels heartbroken over. Or you'll tire of the constant stresses and strains of people's disapproval and all the baggage that goes with a married man.
How did it come do this?

Because sometimes the pull of an instant passion and sexual chemistry completely outweighs our sense of what's right and wrong. This undoubtedly explains the high levels of infidelity I hear of - with about 40% of men and 30% of women admit to having been unfaithful, in at least one of their relationships, at some point in time.
What should you do if you've fallen into this trap?

You might feel like you can't back out of a passionate affair because it's so "good when you're with him". And unfortunately waiting home alone, on the nights he's with his real partner, tends to make you want him all the more.

If you feel that way you've got to ask yourself why you want put yourself through an emotional roller-coaster? Have you done this before and it is it a pattern you repeat going for unsuitable men? Are you addicted to passion? Or is he simply a distraction from a boring life and he gives you excitement?

If you begin by answering that question you can start sorting the situation out. Because often I find women who end up in relationships with married men have low self-worth - they don't think they deserve any more than the snippets of time they manage to steal with him.

Once you've sorted out in your own head what's behind this "aching passion" you need to think about his partner. How would you feel if you were in her shoes? Because quite frankly you can't believe what he says about them "not getting on" or "never having sex", etc. Married men that have affairs are very good liars and he'll lie to you the way he lies to her.

The starting point for helping you decide whether you really want to stay is make sure you don't hang around waiting for him to ring. Keep connected to your friends and get out and enjoy your free time. You might see that life when you're out without him is great. This may open your eyes to the fact that you can do better than what he has to offer.

Don't keep this a secret from your trusted friends or family members. Yes, you might get some flak from them but they're only thinking of your best interests. When you keeps something like this secret it's easier to get hurt. You've got no one to tell when he's mucking you about or when you're lonely waiting for him to ring. From experience I know women who keep it secret stay in these affairs longer and end up with more heartache.

If he tells you he wants to leave his partner then challenge him to do so. I've heard of men promising this for 10 whole years and not doing it! Do you want to waste your life waiting around? You can always tell him that when he separates from her you can start see each other again. Be strong!